British Holiday Parks

We’ve all been there. Being woken up in the middle of the night, with a seething pain lodged in your back, due to a newly erected mole hill under your tent. Yes folks, the dangers of camp sites coupled with the ever-present mole is not something that should be overlooked in these modern health-and-safety-fueled times.

Of course, theres a very easy way to avoid the pain and embarrassment outlined above; buy a caravan.

And before you say it, I know what you’re thinking… pikeys. But to be fair, caravans aren’t just for bare-knuckle fighting, daaaaag owning pikey scum (editors note: it may help if you’ve seen Snatch). No, they’re for hard-working UK holiday makers too - and when you see the wide selection of caravans available to the discerning punter you’ll probably think you need to work a bit harder if you can ever think about owning one.

But forget about all those standard run-of-the-mill caravans. If you want to be the big daddy down at Hoseasons this year, you’ll be wanting this bad boy… ladies and gentlemen, I give you the The Volkner Mobil “Performance” RV:

And yes, thats a sports car docking bay. Cost? a mere £825,000. But if you have that kind of wonga, it kind of begs the question… what the hell are you doing in a caravan in the first place?